Welcome, visitors and fellow μαλάκες!
Come explore a space where the art of μαλακία meets woeful ineptitude across a myriad of subjects. Whether you're here to browse my portfolio, discover recent captures or explore my professional journey as "The Great Champion Masturbator" (verified by Mr. Panos, PhD in Μαλακία), I'm excited to have you along!
I have been blessed to live amongst the best blend of urban and natural beauty. From SF, Austin and now New York, I have sought out the cities replete with the highest abundance of animal and human fecal matter. I am passionately pursuing the dream of contributing my own!
I love to travel! It's where I picked up my passion for photography, and soon after uncovered that I was too shit to make a living from it.
I love all things stats and data, because I can easily fool people into thinking I'm intelligent! I have two statistics degrees to prove it, and it took me double the time to complete them, which means I'm twice as smart.
Graduated Cum Μαλάκα
I almost didn't graduate - I nearly lost my Apple tuition reimbursement due to laziness
I've done competitive Greek folk dancing since I was 5. Fortunately for me, I have friends with incredibly strong backs; without them, my lack of rhythm and dancing finesse would have dragged us towards the bottom of the rankings every year.
Cooking and trying new recipes are favorite pastimes of mine — ask my fiancée to make you something!
Challenge me on chess.com! I am proud of my 95 ELO - it took me the better part of my life to crack above 90! Who knew I could put my hands to better use than constant, day & night μαλακία?
Challenge me on chess.com